I wish it was Fat Camp
I'm fat. They weighed me at the doctor's office today and it's official, I'm fat. Since the last time they weighed me I've gained 8 pounds. That's over the past 3 months. It makes me really sad.
This week I'm a cabin counselor at camp, it's tonnes of fun but I have to eat 3 meals a day with my 8 teenage girls from my cabin. Eating. And everything is gross, processed, yesturday was great when we got celery and carrot sticks with our lunch! I'm not drinking enough water because it just tastes awful, so my lips are even chapped. I can't use laxitives because the washroom is on the other side of camp from my cabin, plus I think people would notice something was going on. I feel like I have no control over food this week because of this. What sucks even more is that I have a girl in my cabin who is actually obese, so I have this constant struggle with her because she doesn't eat enough if the food is gross and she doesn't like it. If I make any comment, even just "would you like anything else instead?" she freaks out at me and starts crying. I know that she has stuff going on for her, but it's hard for me to help her because she doesn't want any kind of support, I don't think she really wants to be at camp and yet, she's there and she triggers some of my stuff.
I love hanging out with my friends at camp. It's fabulous. Some of them I see more of them at camp while we're working then I do all year because they're insanely busy. But at the same time, they get on my nerves. I hear them complain about everyone else, I don't blame them, but it takes it's toll on me. And they've been calling me a cougar. Whatever, I'm so not a cougar, he's only 2 years younger than me and I've only gone out with him twice.
I also feel connected with God while I'm at camp. So much of my faith development was in those woods, cabins, and with those people. I see the vitality that Christ lived through the excited campers and the ones who learn something new about themselves and are able to try a new activity each day. And when I'm having a shitty day there are so many people to be encouraging even when they don't know they are. I feel wanted and needed by people when I'm at camp. There were 2 girls who came and found me on Sunday when they got to camp to tell me how disappointed they were that they weren't in my cabin this year.
Too bad we don't fast while we're at camp (just joking).
This week I'm a cabin counselor at camp, it's tonnes of fun but I have to eat 3 meals a day with my 8 teenage girls from my cabin. Eating. And everything is gross, processed, yesturday was great when we got celery and carrot sticks with our lunch! I'm not drinking enough water because it just tastes awful, so my lips are even chapped. I can't use laxitives because the washroom is on the other side of camp from my cabin, plus I think people would notice something was going on. I feel like I have no control over food this week because of this. What sucks even more is that I have a girl in my cabin who is actually obese, so I have this constant struggle with her because she doesn't eat enough if the food is gross and she doesn't like it. If I make any comment, even just "would you like anything else instead?" she freaks out at me and starts crying. I know that she has stuff going on for her, but it's hard for me to help her because she doesn't want any kind of support, I don't think she really wants to be at camp and yet, she's there and she triggers some of my stuff.
I love hanging out with my friends at camp. It's fabulous. Some of them I see more of them at camp while we're working then I do all year because they're insanely busy. But at the same time, they get on my nerves. I hear them complain about everyone else, I don't blame them, but it takes it's toll on me. And they've been calling me a cougar. Whatever, I'm so not a cougar, he's only 2 years younger than me and I've only gone out with him twice.
I also feel connected with God while I'm at camp. So much of my faith development was in those woods, cabins, and with those people. I see the vitality that Christ lived through the excited campers and the ones who learn something new about themselves and are able to try a new activity each day. And when I'm having a shitty day there are so many people to be encouraging even when they don't know they are. I feel wanted and needed by people when I'm at camp. There were 2 girls who came and found me on Sunday when they got to camp to tell me how disappointed they were that they weren't in my cabin this year.
Too bad we don't fast while we're at camp (just joking).
posted by Womyn in Troubled Waters at 11:35 AM
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